Was I Love?

“Sometimes I think…
What will people say of me,
When I'm only just a memory,
When I'm home where my soul belongs?
Was I love
When no one else would show up?
Was I Jesus to the least of us?
Was my worship more than just a song?”

Sidewalk Prophets

    

     I was fortunate to spend much of today with a friend.  Our discussions flowed much like my own thoughts, ranging from sharing burdens of the heart to my complaint of how my fingers smelled like pennies after digging through my purse for toll money.  (I can’t stand that!)  The thought that has lingered most from our conversations has been one of the testimonies of a few fellow friends.  Their testimony is one of simplicity, yet has a most profound impact, and I’m left examining myself for the smallest spec of similarity.  They are Christ-like.  They’re the kind of people you love, and when you leave their presence, you feel somehow better and favored to have made their acquaintance.  Their similarities to Christ are so strong you can’t help but think of your time with them and smile, and something about it makes you feel like you have spent time alone with Christ Himself.  At times, their smile or word of encouragement catches you off guard, and you wonder if you had told them what you had been feeling…then forgot you told them.  (Not that I ever do that.)  Other times, their text or email comes at such a precise time, you know they listen intently and follow every leading of the Holy Spirit.  By the way…my friend is that way.  I’m so very thankful for her friendship and (sometimes brutal) honesty.

     Another thing we discussed was the situation of a loved one facing rejection.  Can anything be so debilitating as rejection?  Could anything be farther from Christ and all He came to be and teach?  Christ stands at the door of the Church saying, “Come,” and we stand at the same door to hand out a list of prerequisites.  Our children quote verses of Scripture and carry years of resentment for being treated contrary to the life those verses proclaim.  I’ve recently read of several young children who believed suicide was the only relief from the terrible pain of rejection.  Can anything be more heartbreaking to the God of Heaven?  Are we teaching our children to be loved or to be love?  Are we raising Christians or critics?  Rejection is inevitable in this world, but God help us to guard against its cruelty ever being administered in the Name of Christ and in the place where His Word is supposed to be the final authority and influence of our lives!  And may we do all we can to heal the wounds it has already inflicted and stop its destructive course!       

     I may never be more than a stay-at-home wife and mother.  The only thing I do this year may be to simply stay happily married and try to raise daughters who act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God.  Though my heart aches to do a “great thing”, I know that I may only be called to do a few “good things”.  But, my prayer is that God would help me to do whatever He calls me to do with the bold love of Christ and arms as open as His! 

“But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not,

to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.”

Matthew 19:14

A Resting Place

     I woke in the wee hours of this morning with a stomach virus.  Joy.  (Please note extreme sarcasm.)  So, while everything I had planned for today had to be cancelled, the nice thing is that I have had the time to lay around, read, and put a few thoughts on paper…and I’ve decided it’s definitely time for that bathroom remodel I’ve been considering.  I’ll just leave that thought right there.

     One thing that has weighed heavy on my mind lately is the subject of faith.  Knowing (and loving) many people facing heart-breaking circumstances as of late, I have been troubled to constantly question, along with the Savior, “…when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?”  (Luke 18:8)    I am a novice student of the Bible and doubt very little you could look elsewhere to find a much more in-depth, accurate study on faith.  I would, however, like to share with you some of the promptings of the Holy Spirit through my personal study and experiences and ask you to prayerfully consider your view and decide whether faith is the real motivator of your decisions and speech.

Something That Should Never Be Called “Faith”:

Denial is not faith!

     Doubtless, we have all heard of the “name it and claim it” movement sweeping the Church-world today.  I believe this movement has done a great deal of harm to real faith in the Church, and is rooted in a humanistic, “mind-over-matter” mentality, instead of the Word of God.  Romans 4:17 seems to be a big calling card verse for this movement, and people have been told to call “those things which be not as though they were.”  We must be very careful to view every verse of Scripture in its context!  If you will read the verse in its entirety, you will see that the Apostle Paul is speaking of “…even God, who quickeneth the dead, and calleth those things which be not as though they were. “  It is God who speaks things into existence from nothingness.  We are mortals, in a sin-cursed world.  Adversities and sicknesses are inevitable.  Even Jesus was “a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief”. (Isa. 53:3)  So much of the praise He is worthy of has been stolen by this incorrect view of Scripture, and I am convinced Satan himself is at the root of its lie.  When we deny someone has an illness, for example, we will probably not pray as we have been commanded, and when Christ does heal, He is not praised for His work or answer to our prayer…because we have simply ignored the problem.  We have taken the easy way out.  We have replaced asking in faith with pretense and denial.  This is simply unscriptural.    

     My friends, as much as I can possibly know my own heart…I am speaking out of love for you.  Denying the problem is robbing God of His Son’s glory, and breaking His heart.  Please note that every instance in the Bible where a miracle performed by Christ is recorded…He acknowledged the infirmity first.  The woman who touched His garment’s hem and received healing is referred to as “diseased with an issue of blood”.  (Matthew 9:20)  How could we ever forget the man who was “born blind” who received his sight at Jesus’ touch?   So many other examples are given of the miracles of our Master!  However, none of them would have been miracles had everyone denied the condition of the seekers.  Matthew 15:31 says, “Insomuch that the multitude wondered, when they saw the dumb to speak, the maimed to be whole, the lame to walk, and the blind to see: and they glorified the God of Israel.”

     Can you see how Satan has used this lie to his advantage?  The cruel irony is that scores of Christians end up carrying the burden of problems through denial instead of saying, “Here is the problem, Lord.  It is too much for me, but I know You are able to bear every burden, and I will not look on my faith, but on You, the Author and Finisher of my faith.”  You will end up weary and jaded if you place your confidence in anything other than His stripes for our healing.  There is no peace or assurance in looking within ourselves or looking away.  We must be sure to always be “Looking unto Jesus.” (Hebrews 12:2)        

“My faith has found a resting place,
Not in device nor creed;
I trust the Ever-living One,
His wounds for me shall plead.”