From what we gather in Genesis 16, once Hagar sees that she has conceived a child, she despises Sarai. While scripture doesn't tell us why Hagar despises Sarai, I can't help but think she was bitter that Sarai would ultimately receive the blessing she was forced to carry. Our deepest and strongest bitterness usually results from someone else receiving blessings we were forced to relinquish. Some believe Hagar began to flaunt her position as the patriarch's new wife, while others believe that, despite this union being a result of her own scheming, Sarai was outraged that God would give this Egyptian slave girl a child and was consumed with jealousy. She goes to Abram over the discord, and he tells her to handle the situation as she sees fit. Unfortunately, Sarai was more than happy to set Hagar straight, and verse 6 tells us she "dealt hardly with" her. The same word used here is used to describe the oppression of the Israelites in Egypt by Pharaoh's hand, so we can assume it was physical abuse common to slaves. If you're anything like me, you're ready to grab Sarai by the Hebrew head covering and give her a taste of her own medicine, but we must remember that in our present time, we just as often see the actions of leaders, even professed Christians, whom God has promised great blessing reflect their culture rather than their Creator. Pride has always led to falls, and jealousy hasn't stopped being cruel as the grave. Though this isn't the last time we'll see Sarai act spitefully, God, in His mercy will eventually forgive and use Sarai. He can forgive and use us despite our major shames and biased reactions, as well. We learn from Sarai that when we choose shortcuts to God's will, our own choices become our chastisement. However, we also learn from Hagar that our mistreatment can be compounded by our own wrong responses to the injuries of others.
Hagar's hurt sends her running, and she finds herself in the wilderness of Shur, most likely on her way home to Egypt. While studying this, it struck me that she was leaving one bondage to run back to another. We, too, can become slaves to situations, and even worse, we can choose one slavery over another. Bondage, whether it be to a substance, relationship, position, approval, etc. is a heartbreaking thing to watch, but it so much more heartbreaking to watch someone run from one slavery to another. Every time I begin to feel powerless, hopeless, or trapped in a certain season or situation, I find myself mentally and spiritually revisiting the old stomping grounds...forgetting that I was on the receiving end of most of the stomping. If I was to truly survey that time, though, would I really be willing to trade my present situation for the past? Would I be willing to relinquish the strength gained by the fight? Would I forego this present trial and return to the ignorance and immaturity of the former yoke of bondage? Perhaps your situation is far worse than any I have faced, and you would choose anything but your present circumstance, but please understand that while what God may be presently allowing seems unbearable, He never intends us to move from one slavery to another. Most likely, Hagar had never known life outside of slavery, and maybe you have never known life much different from your present circumstance, but beware familiarity! It can cause us to fantasize ourselves right back into bondage or keep us there! We will see several chapters later that God was allowing this series of events in Hagar's life to move her from Abram's household to freedom. I wonder how many times God has stalled me in the wilderness because He knew I was choosing an old bondage over the present situation that He was working for my good.
In His mercy, the angel of the Lord appears to Hagar in the wilderness (Gen. 16:8-12), addresses her as "Sarai's maid", and asks her from where had she come and where was she going. Obviously, He knew the answers, but I believe He was giving Hagar a chance to audibly rationalize her situation. God always addresses us where we are. Though it may sound demeaning on the surface, God is opening Hagar's eyes to the fact that He is a God who cares for Egyptian slave girls who find themselves in the wilderness. Sadly, this was a truth that the lives of Abram and Sarai had never communicated to Hagar. I, personally, think that is the saddest part of the story, but I am so thankful our mistreatment by man never diminishes our value to God.
While we can almost understand why Hagar is running, we cannot overlook the fact that she is doing so aimlessly and inconsiderately to her unborn child. You can be sure, running will always land you in a wilderness, and you'll realize how many you have failed to consider along the way. Thankfully, God can visit any wilderness, whether it be a hospital bed, a rehab center, an orphanage, a struggling ministry, a lonely lunch table, or a heart and mind seemingly trapped in the mundane responsibilities of everyday life. God visits the wilderness. And He goes even further by preparing us a table there. Hagar was blessed to see the Lord, but her praise flows from the realization that He had seen her. Her encounter leads her to name Him Beer-lahai-roi, meaning, "Thou God seest me." Sometimes, more than seeing Him, there is greater comfort in knowing He sees us. Wherever we are. However we feel. And though we may run into a wilderness as a servant of man, as servants to their applause, their whims, their criticism...like Hagar, we can return as servants of God.
God promises to bless Hagar and her son, Ishmael and tells her to return and submit herself to Sarai. Now aware that God's eye is ever on the situation, Hagar returns to Abram's house where she will live until Ishmael is around 19 years old. Unfortunately, old grudges will resurface and she will be sent into the wilderness with her son. This time, in the wilderness of Beer-sheba (Gen. 21:9-19), she and her son would near death, and again God would come to Hagar's side. This time, He would not refer to her as the handmaid of Sarai, but simply as Hagar, because now, despite the pain of rejection, she was free. Don't forget the freedom you felt once you overcame that crushing rejection, and if you're still struggling to breathe through it, let the exhausting pressure of it land you at the feet of Jesus. Verses 19-20 tell us that "God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water; and she went, and filled the bottle with water, and gave the lad drink. And God was with the lad..." Sometimes, only extreme conditions will force our eyes open to God's provision, our ears open to His voice. With that, comes the stunning reality that God sees. Hagar, as a slave, was unseen in her culture, but she was very visible to the God of Heaven. In this culture where Christianity is either unseen or demeaned, we can know with certainty that nothing regarding His children is escaping our Father's notice, and He is working on our behalf. And lest we despise the wandering and seemingly invisible times, let us remember that our wilderness can result in a freedom we have never known and water that restores life to our parched souls and thirsty children.
"For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him." 2 Chronicles 16:9
Disclaimer: Please never mistake anything in this post to promote staying in an abusive relationship. God NEVER intends us to make the wilderness our permanent home!
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